That's what I'd say HIV is.
This insidious infection that took over the life of someone I knew dearly.
Shamina was a career woman and matronly wife rolled into one - who also took special effort to take care of Jake, 2, and Pearla, 4. She would regularly come home, exhausted from her meetings upon reports upon presentations, but somehow willed her bones to summon more energy and love for her kids. Just so mummy could at least kiss them goodnight, or maybe read them a bedtime story. In fact, I counted myself lucky to have the very occasional coffee with her on the weekend maybe once in 3 or 4 months, if she got her in-laws to help with the children.
She had no idea she was HIV positive for years - why would she, since she had been only faithful to her husband and her world revolved around her family?
It was a rude shock to her - and to me and our small group of close friends - when the diagnosis was out on those weird patches and mega diarrhoea. She had late-stage AIDS, and the next flu or random virus could end her life.
Then she told me something she had not spoken about to any of us: That Clint used to have very frequent business trips to Cambodia, Vietnam and Thailand as part of his posting in a foreign bank based here. Heck, I even knew a couple of his colleagues from JC days. On a number of those trips - let's park it conservatively at 15 - sex workers were part of them. He had not used any condoms. F***, how can you be so stupid in this day and age?
The most mind-numbingly stupid part of this whole ridiculousness is the reaction from her relatives. When they heard of her diagnosis, all except Aunty Soo Mei started retreating from her family and - I can't believe this - were saying things about her being promiscuous! Gawd. The line between cause-and-effect and stupendous absurdity is finer that I would like to believe in people. Shamina needed their support. So much. It kills me to remember the pain in her eyes when she said to me, "How are the kids going to grow up in this family now?"
It kills me now, again.
===
His minute of recklessness cost more than her children could bear for the rest of their lives. Dammit, it cost more than we could bear.
She was so strong, so beautiful, right until the end.
I hate Clint for ending Shamina's life, but even that is a wasted emotion on such a selfish bastard.
I wish Shamina was still here. I miss you.
- Karen, 25, consultant
[Identities have been changed.]
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment